Thank you for this message. I’ve always considered “flaky” to be a shallow person, but I like the idea that “flaky” can be the person who just isn’t into being your friend. If they were, they would, I agree, be there or phone you back.

I’ve had a friend from high school who I thought I was close to, she was one of my bride’s maids, who I have been trying get in touch with since Christmas. I phone and leave a message about once a month. In the last 6 months, she has never returned the call.

With your message, I believe that I will now leave the friendship up to her. If, and when, she calls, I will be congenial, but I will not be desperately trying to reach her any more. And yes, that hurts, but so be it.

Thank you.